concasse | OGATA

[He can smell the fish from here. Nice nice.]

What do you mean you "made sure"? Did you personally imbue her with that intelligence?
[He can't understand so much of this situation. The more he learns, the less it makes sense.]

Yeah.

[...

Sorry Ogata, the castle was a Time]

I'm too lazy to explain the particulars right now, but the place I was last at was like a... uh... a fucked-up fairy tale. We had to collect ink from three different factions, and since we all decided to use it for ourselves, we got to "write" whatever ending we wanted.

[Nodding to Nami]

I didn't wanna leave her behind in the castle, so I "wrote" her up a scenario where she's as smart as any human, and will stay with me and my crew until she decides she wants to leave.

[Hm. Ogata would have just written her out of existence, but sure, fine, most people wouldn't do that.]

At that rate, I'm shocked you didn't make her talk.
[Not that he's really complaining. He's glad the tiger doesn't have that ability.]

... Yeah, uh. I thought about it.

[Goddamn, getting called out by accident]

But a talking tiger seemed a little much -- plus I'm the only one who'd expect it, anyway. Everyone else would run for the hills or try to hunt her down.

They might anyway. I know some cultures think killing a tiger is bad luck, but I'm sure most others wouldn't have a problem with it.

[Regardless, he's not used to this much small talk, so;]
Are you almost done cooking?

Oi, show some patience. Cooking is a process, you know! I can't whip it up outta thin air.

[Sounding a lot gruffer than he actually looks, as his eyes remain focused on the work in front of him. The base is prepared -- now it's simmering and seasoning that come next]

But anyway... if anyone tries to hurt her, I'll snap their neck in half. So that'll solve that problem for a while.

Asirpa doesn't take this long when she cooks.
[HMPH.]

You don't look like the sort that would have that level of raw power.

[smiling w i d e l y as he suddenly turns his head]

Is that right, shithead? Feel up to a spar later?

[Please make his fuckin day.]

[He won't bc as a sniper he is not specialized in melee fight.]

No. I'm not some meathead that gets enjoyment out of that sort of thing.
[This is a lie, he just doesn't want to bc he would lose.]

No, I'd just clearly kick your ass.

[SANJI KNOWS HIS WORTH IN A BATTLE, and he gives Ogata a look of "hm, disappointing"--

Before turning back to the food that just needs to simmer]

Besides, in a place like this, not knowing how to defend yourself physically is gonna get your ass killed. Does your weapon even got any bullets in it?

[The way Ogata tenses slightly, eyes widening in muted alarm is all the answer he's giving to that question, so he's lucky Sanji isn't looking at him.]

I don't know why you think I'm going to answer that.
[Running a hand over his hair, calming.]

But I don't think it matters in the long run. If a bullet to the head doesn't stop someone, being able to throw a punch is irrelevant. And I don't miss.

[There is so much there Sanji is dying to rip into.

But he doesn't, because he agrees to a certain extent: this is irrelevant for now, and more or less the chef just speaking into the wind]

Oooo... you sound confident. Wonder if you can hold a candle to my sniper, though.

[Oh, he actually perks up at this.]

I wouldn't mind finding out. [Sounds fun.] I can't help but wonder what sort of chef has a sniper on retainer, though.

-- Ah, shit. Did I not mention...?

[Glancing over his shoulder again]

I'm a pirate chef. The sniper's the crew's gunman.

[BLINKS.]

You didn't. You were preoccupied trying to justify your animal companion, I think.
[Pirate chef... that's sure a thing, huh.]

I didn't know pirates even employed snipers.

... You're such a pleasant shit to be around, you know that?

[Does Ogata have friends? Sanji is betting on "no"]

And sure we got 'em. You need someone who can man the cannons, but sometimes shit gets nasty when you're on land. Having a sniper at your back is useful.

And Usopp is the best there is.

I do my best.

[He doesn't, no.]

... I certainly can't argue with you, though. I wish more people saw the use of snipers. We might've had far fewer casualties in the war, then.

-- War?

[Giving him another glance over]

Ah, you a soldier...?

I was, until recently.
[Does he mean since he's been in murdergame hell for the last few weeks or before that? Unclear. He's certainly not specifying.]

But it was a solid nine years, I think.

Damn, that's a while...

[Sanji read the profiles but can't recall Ogata's age off the top of his head.]

War as ugly as everyone says it is?

[Heh, as if Sanji doesn't already know, but. Still. He wants to hear an answer]

[He laughs.]

I'm not sure if that's the word I'd use, but I suppose so. What people miss is the monotony. There's a lot more sitting around in the cold dirt than you'd expect. The fighting isn't non-stop. Though sometimes those lulls do more to drive men mad than the actual fighting.
[HM.]

OGATA

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goddamn this got lost in my inbox

just means I get a surprise fun bonus tag bc I forget everything