concasse | STEPH

[Sanji already knows what's going to happen when he and Steph catch eyes. It ain't his first rodeo anymore, and despite having tried to sneak back to his cabin without being spotted, well --

This is what he gets for being optimistic.

There's a brief moment where his expression bleeds into a silent apology, sorry about whatever nonsense you're gonna see, Steph-chan, and then the scenery shifts into...

into this.

At which point Sanji yells in delight once the memory is over? Because--]

Oh shit, right! The floating islands! Damn, it's really been over two years.

[ SHE OPENS HER MOUTH

AND THEN CLOSES IT

AND OPENS HER MOUTH AGAIN.

CLOSES IT. HM. ]

What?

[~~ONE PIECE~~]

There was this asshole with a devil fruit power that made shit float, even whole islands -- and then the bastard had the nerve to kidnap my crew's navigator.

So, naturally, we had to go looking for her.

[obviously that is what was going on]

[ there are a lot of different parts of the explanation that he skipped ]

I. See.

You guys were busy.

Honestly, we get shit like that every other weekend.

[Never a dull day on the Straw Hat crew]

Anyway, the guy with me was Usopp, my sniper -- a blabbermouth but he's got good aim and a good heart.

He seemed tired.

[ it's funny, actually. sanji is definitely a handful. ]

[Everyone thought Sanji was the smart, pragmatic one.

...

They were so wrong]

Nah, he always gets like that when we're up against giant animals.

Is it just against giant animals?

[ SANJI YOUR USOPP ]

-- Alright, alright.

Anything that's a vague threat to his person.

[So, y'know. A NORMAL HUMAN BEING]

Ah...

Being a pirate must be a journey for him.

Yeah, but he does better than you'd think. Even when he's jumpin' at his own shitty shadow, that never stops him from coming to a friend's aid when they need him.

Nah, he sounds like a pretty good guy. Just a good guy with high blood pressure.

[ sometimes, you suffer.

but before she can comment any more, another memory plays. ]

... huh.

[... Gurl.

Sanji just had a memory with a giant ass tiger and now he's the one staring at Steph like she's grown two heads]

... I... I didn't follow jack shit of that.

[VAMPIRES? BATGIRLS? SELF AWARE JOKES?]

... there were evil, fake vampires causing chaos in the city.

[ that is

the simplest explanation she can think of. ]

That was my friend Kara. She's an alien.

[...]

Aaaaaah~! And what a beautiful alien she is, too~!

[When in doubt, just... just flirt, he guesses.]

[ she snorts. ]

She's pretty cool. Super strong, super smart... ah, some blondes get it all.

[ the joke is that both people in this thread is blonde ]

[Sanji's a loser and strikes a bow because indeed, he is all of those things (not)]

Don't they! Just look at us, Steph-chwan, the picture of perfection~!

[he says while wiggling like a noodle]