week 6 | Friday, Post-Investigation

[concasse]

[Hey... knock knock, Eichi. It's your favorite neighborhood chef at your door, who is sick with grief but also so high on irritability that he can't keep still, so it isn't long before he decides there are better ways to burn off his fury.

Natsuo and Ion might be gone, but there are others he needs to look after.]

Eichi? It's me.

Comments

[concasse]

[... Ah.

He. Stares at the coin.



It feels like he can't breathe, suddenly.]

You... killed someone to protect someone?

[He can't breathe, he can't, he can't--]

[finethanks]

[He can't look at Sanji's face now. Just seeing that initial reaction, feeling his own disgust with himself combined with that horrible expression that could mean anything— he turns away, pained, his chest tightening and sick, and nods.]

[concasse]

-- Don't.

[Voice thick. Sanji is--]

You can't confess tomorrow.

[Not having this at all.]

What happened? Tell me exactly. Take your time, but I need to know the details.

[finethanks]

...

[He doesn't say he will or won't, and he's struggling to focus on his breathing, but his eyes are back on Sanji. Curious, tempted... but too sharp.]

I'm sorry, Sanji. I may lay burdens on you again and again, but I can't provide you with a weapon that could allow you to insist your own guilt in this, should anything happen.

[He doesn't trust Sanji to not try to take the fall for him if things go south!!]

But... I'll tell you that it was Fane-san.

[concasse]

[Damn right Sanji would take the fuckin fall, he lost Ion and Natsuo today, he is not losing a third--

Teeth grit, Sanji breathes in thick and exhales sharply, an attempt to collect himself.]

But in order for you to get that coin, you had to kill defending someone.

Was Zelos the one you defended?

[finethanks]

...Please don't attempt to justify my actions.

[Eichi curls his fingers around the coin again, too tight and still trembling.]

I was aware that he was moving to kill someone, but I had no idea who it might be when I struck first. The actions of "heroes" who are glorified for excuses of why it was "right" and not "wrong"... I want no part of that.

I killed someone before they could kill someone else, and that's all it was. I'm just another pawn in this game, after all... A civilian who needed to complete an objective in order to win our "happy ending." And Fane-san... Knowing nothing about him, I thought "I have to kill him."

It's disgusting, isn't it? It's horrible, isn't it? I'll have to stay in this room all day, hugging my legs and telling myself that I can be fine, that I can continue to stay alive and protect someone next week with my own life. For me to die at an execution when my life could be provided as a sacrifice to save another... it would be a waste. I have to keep telling myself that.

[He has a coughing fit after that, because he talked too much.]

[concasse]

[Sanji... stares into the fabric of the bed cover, silent throughout, expression having finally smoothed into something more in control. Like Eichi didn't just tell him he killed Fane.

...]

If you're looking for someone to condemn your actions, you won't hear it from me.

[His voice is rigid, but level]

I'm a pirate, remember? For my crew, I've done plenty of shit other people wouldn't be proud of to admit -- just to keep them safe and alive.

What the world sees as "right" and "wrong" don't mean shit to me. You're one of my own, so I'll protect you tomorrow, as best I can.

[finethanks]

You... don't hate me?

[The surprise is more genuine than it should be, he realizes, as he watches Sanji some more. Of course he doesn't. And so Eichi leans into him a little, looking to slyly steal a hug out of it. (Besides, Sanji's warm and he's cold.)]

Then... can I be part of your crew? I've always wanted to do something like adventure. [Talking like he didn't do anything makes him feel stronger. He feels like he can get his act together, pretend everything is fine tomorrow.

Sanji is just... Sanji, of course, and Eichi can't live with lying to him about this.]

I don't want to die... so thank you, Sanji. Thank you... Please, if I seem to be cracking, then I'd appreciate your distractions. If possible... I'd like to live on, with you, with Goro, with Zelos-kun... [Maybe he'd list more if everyone didn't fucking dIE]

[concasse]

[He hears those words, and his mind flashes to years past, a woman standing at the top of a tower, crying as her crew waits to hear her answer.

I want to live

Smiling some, he wraps a hand around Eichi's shoulders]

Of course. We'll get you through this, alright? And I know you're not looking to make excuses for yourself, but don't undercut what you can do for others, either. People are gonna need your protection, and just seeing you around.

[finethanks]

Thank you.

[He says it again, appreciating the arm around him even as he worries that he'll mess something up, that things will go south. But he'll shake these negative thoughts by the end of today. At least for the trial, he can appear in control. For now, though? He sighs in the way you do after a long cry, shuddering and quick.]

...By the way, I can feel that this troublesome body of mine won't allow me to walk more than a few steps at a time, today... so could I trouble you by asking you to bring me something to eat later today? If it's your cooking, it helps my spirit, as well as everything else.

[concasse]

Of course I'll bring you something.

[No more thoughts of messing things up, kid. Sanji doesn't voice it, but whatever happens, will happen. It's up to them to make the choices that they'll be able to live with.]

Until then, get some rest, eh? Try and keep warm. Bug that roommate of yours if you gotta.

[finethanks]

I plan on it.

[Nothing says coverup for goose bites like rough sex. They literally plan this and I hate them, but anyway, he smiles gratefully at the promise of food.]

You should also rest, Sanji. When you can. It must be tiring, to go to each investigation. I'll be sure to check on you later, so I hope you won't have dark circles under your eyes. [eye, from what he can see, but still.]