His head cranes back until it's rested against the couch again, blissful expression starting to slide towards anxiety the longer he sits in his head. Right, right...
He never did bring up that letter, did he?
What a perfect time to discuss it now, except Sanji is certain he'd rather break into hives. The continuous dilemma. He really is shit at this kind of thing]
[ If being called a nerd offended him, Yusuke would be in a state of perpetual offence honestly. So he just huffs, but enjoys the kiss as well.
Or... y'know. He'd be happy to keep enjoying that warm feeling it leaves him with if it wasn't... worryingly apparent that there's some kind of whirlwind whipping itself up in Sanji's head. So, he pokes him in the side. Gently, because he knows the drill there with how ticklish Sanji is, but it's still a little poke. ]
[So neck deep in his thoughts that he barely registers the poke. It takes Yusuke verbally prodding him for Sanji to pay attention, though even then it's with some measure of reluctance.
He knows damn well he won't let himself chicken out of this now that it's on his mind, and with such a perfect setup, too. Yusuke... deserves better.
(even if Sanji doesn't think it's him because he knows what a high maintenance commitment he is but he knows where that thought process leads so he's gonna try for once in his life to not get trapped in that negative nancy loop okay it's cool he's got this just admit it--)]
Found your letter.
[Please don't ask when he found it. The answer will not shock anyone but Sanji can only handle so much shame right now.]
I-- uh. If you wanted to... talk about it...?
[He is trying. So hard. To not jerk out of the couch like his skin is crawling.]
[ Well that's almost concerning. He's never seen Sanji not react to being poked. Enough that Yusuke twists himself around a little so that he can see Sanji's face properly.
But his concern softens into comprehension when Sanji speaks up again. Thinking about it, there are a lot of things he doesn't know about his boyfriend. It doesn't concern him too much, as everyone has a right to their own privacy, but it does mean he's seen that almost panic-loop he gets himself into about situations that require opening up and putting parts of yourself that even you are afraid of or worried about out in the open. The silence and the lack of reaction make a lot of sense, if this was the topic Sanji was trying to bring up. ]
That depends on if you want to as well. I did write it down rather than just tell you for a reason.
[ It's. Well, it's true. He's one hundred per cent certain Sanji would have bolted, even if it was only temporarily, if he'd just told him out of the blue. And maybe it had been selfish of him, but he hadn't wanted to see that happen.
Nor does he really want to see it happen now. ]
But I think I said what I wanted to say well enough.
[Lifting his head from the couch, just to gently knock it back in a slight show of irritation, letting his skull thump against the fabric]
You shouldn't have to wait months for a reply, though.
[The frustration's aimed at himself, his cowardice, that he really doesn't want to talk about this at all. It was so much easier to coast along without a second thought, let the days pass by and the months rack up. Not think too deeply about how long he'd been dating Yusuke.
He misses that naive bliss like the idiot he is.]
Shit, the fact you had to write a letter in the first place is...
[Well, it doesn't say a lot of good things about himself, is what he's getting at. Only respect for Yusuke keeps him from asking again if the artist is sure about this -- this relationship they've gotten tangled in. Because from where Sanji's looking, this is a net negative, and--
-- What I'm trying to get at is your taste in men still sucks but I don't really mind at this point.
[Spoken in a rush, a hand covering his forehead to blot out some of the heat that's radiating from it. Whoo boy maybe if he begs for mercy, Yusuke will put him on ice, and they will never have to speak of this again.
[ Yusuke was going to say something about the fact that he hid a letter meant he didn't know how long he'd technically been "waiting" for a response, which was sort of the point. But then, y'know...
Sanji just keeps going. It's almost fascinating to watch - he doesn't always get the way Sanji's mind works when it comes to, well, not putting himself down most of the time. In moments like these though, he can almost see it though. Long pauses, cutting himself off, retracting his statements...
This isn't really the moment to find it funny, but... he can't help but laugh? Just a little. It's kinda like proof to himself - not that he really needed it - that he isn't making any mistakes here. ]
I don't know. I think my taste in men is very much above average, personally.
[Like watching a particularly dumb puppy chase its own tail to the point of crippling anxiety. The Recollé Sanji experience.
He's also giving Yusuke a look when the other chuckles, knowing it's not meant to be personal but still feeling a little stung by it. Though he supposes if anyone's got a license to laugh at his stupidity, it'd be his boyfriend. God knows he puts up with a lot already.
... Doesn't stop the pout, though. Or the muttered rebuttal of:]
H-hey, I'm trying here...
[He thought he did-- okay he thought he did horrendously for a first attempt. A sigh escapes him, the man slouching into the couch.]
And, y'know. Yusuke knows he's trying. That just makes it all the more genuine... and sweet, in its own way. He manages to swallow down the urge to laugh again, and leans a little more into Sanji's side.
[ There's a pause, and then Yusuke whacks his forehead into Sanji's arm. Okay, y'know? Y'know. He'll take this. He'd been expecting to wait longer, so this is good? But two years?
That, uh.
That would have been a lot. Even for him. ]
I'd... expected longer than this, honestly. But not that long.
[ He can't?? Shuffle?? He's holding a drink. Hold on. He's gonna set the drink down and ignore the hissy, huffy noise Chou makes as he does... and then he turns to sit himself on the sofa, facing Sanji. ]
Perhaps we should be attempting to desensitise you to such attacks.
This is just revenge for saying your shitty temper is worse than mine!!
[Lord, he's starting to descend into French comebacks, too, which is how you know the man is flustered. No he doesn't want. to be. tickled??? Smack him, throw him out a window, set him on fire -- he will take any of those punishments instead.
-- Also, Sanji is no coward, but he might be edging toward his bedroom, with that damned pillow still held out like a weapon]
[ All of those sound way worse than being tickled?? Still, Yusuke is just going to... follow him. Because apparently his boyfriend is the sort of cOwArD that tries to make a break for it when the threat of tickling is involved. ]
I am not the one that gets into at least one fight every time we go on a date.
That's no reason to light them up though, you know.
[ Ah, okay. While he is shook and defenceless, Yusuke swoops in and... just catches hold of Sanji's face and presses a kiss to his lips. Very brief, and mostly for an element of surprise. ]
But the valiant attempts "go on the defensive" are appreciated on some level.
[ Your pillow can't save you now, Sanji. He's in your bubble. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
His head cranes back until it's rested against the couch again, blissful expression starting to slide towards anxiety the longer he sits in his head. Right, right...
He never did bring up that letter, did he?
What a perfect time to discuss it now, except Sanji is certain he'd rather break into hives. The continuous dilemma. He really is shit at this kind of thing]
no subject
Or... y'know. He'd be happy to keep enjoying that warm feeling it leaves him with if it wasn't... worryingly apparent that there's some kind of whirlwind whipping itself up in Sanji's head. So, he pokes him in the side. Gently, because he knows the drill there with how ticklish Sanji is, but it's still a little poke. ]
Penny for your thoughts?
no subject
He knows damn well he won't let himself chicken out of this now that it's on his mind, and with such a perfect setup, too. Yusuke... deserves better.
(even if Sanji doesn't think it's him because he knows what a high maintenance commitment he is but he knows where that thought process leads so he's gonna try for once in his life to not get trapped in that negative nancy loop okay it's cool he's got this just admit it--)]
Found your letter.
[Please don't ask when he found it. The answer will not shock anyone but Sanji can only handle so much shame right now.]
I-- uh. If you wanted to... talk about it...?
[He is trying. So hard. To not jerk out of the couch like his skin is crawling.]
no subject
But his concern softens into comprehension when Sanji speaks up again. Thinking about it, there are a lot of things he doesn't know about his boyfriend. It doesn't concern him too much, as everyone has a right to their own privacy, but it does mean he's seen that almost panic-loop he gets himself into about situations that require opening up and putting parts of yourself that even you are afraid of or worried about out in the open. The silence and the lack of reaction make a lot of sense, if this was the topic Sanji was trying to bring up. ]
That depends on if you want to as well. I did write it down rather than just tell you for a reason.
[ It's. Well, it's true. He's one hundred per cent certain Sanji would have bolted, even if it was only temporarily, if he'd just told him out of the blue. And maybe it had been selfish of him, but he hadn't wanted to see that happen.
Nor does he really want to see it happen now. ]
But I think I said what I wanted to say well enough.
1/??
You shouldn't have to wait months for a reply, though.
[The frustration's aimed at himself, his cowardice, that he really doesn't want to talk about this at all. It was so much easier to coast along without a second thought, let the days pass by and the months rack up. Not think too deeply about how long he'd been dating Yusuke.
He misses that naive bliss like the idiot he is.]
Shit, the fact you had to write a letter in the first place is...
[Well, it doesn't say a lot of good things about himself, is what he's getting at. Only respect for Yusuke keeps him from asking again if the artist is sure about this -- this relationship they've gotten tangled in. Because from where Sanji's looking, this is a net negative, and--
... He's doing the loop again, isn't he? Ugh.]
I mean, I... appreciated the... effort?
no subject
That is a terrible way to respond to an "I love you", isn't it?
Someone put him out of his misery.]
No, wait, lemme try again--
no subject
no subject
5/5 smh smh
[Spoken in a rush, a hand covering his forehead to blot out some of the heat that's radiating from it. Whoo boy maybe if he begs for mercy, Yusuke will put him on ice, and they will never have to speak of this again.
Because this is not going well. At all.]
10 out of 10 A+ he did his best
Sanji just keeps going. It's almost fascinating to watch - he doesn't always get the way Sanji's mind works when it comes to, well, not putting himself down most of the time. In moments like these though, he can almost see it though. Long pauses, cutting himself off, retracting his statements...
This isn't really the moment to find it funny, but... he can't help but laugh? Just a little. It's kinda like proof to himself - not that he really needed it - that he isn't making any mistakes here. ]
I don't know. I think my taste in men is very much above average, personally.
no subject
He's also giving Yusuke a look when the other chuckles, knowing it's not meant to be personal but still feeling a little stung by it. Though he supposes if anyone's got a license to laugh at his stupidity, it'd be his boyfriend. God knows he puts up with a lot already.
... Doesn't stop the pout, though. Or the muttered rebuttal of:]
H-hey, I'm trying here...
[He thought he did-- okay he thought he did horrendously for a first attempt. A sigh escapes him, the man slouching into the couch.]
Knew I should've waited two more shitty years...
no subject
And, y'know. Yusuke knows he's trying. That just makes it all the more genuine... and sweet, in its own way. He manages to swallow down the urge to laugh again, and leans a little more into Sanji's side.
Yes.
He doesn't have any regrets. ]
... ? Two more years? For what?
[ FOR WHAT...? ]
no subject
Uh... Bringing up the letter.
[tWO yeaRs, you heard him.
I say again, welcome to the Recollé Sanji experience.]
no subject
That, uh.
That would have been a lot. Even for him. ]
I'd... expected longer than this, honestly. But not that long.
no subject
8D]
Aren't you glad I didn't wait?
[Wow and just like that, Sanji's confidence is back!
-- Mostly because he's torturing Yusuke now, so. This... is about par for the course]
no subject
There's just silence for a moment and then...
...
he pokes Sanji in the side.
REVENGE. ]
no subject
He gives Yusuke a look of pure disapproval]
... Renard. I'm only saying this outta concern.
But we really gotta do something about your temper.
[Sanji in every canon was a mistake.]
no subject
[ He can't?? Shuffle?? He's holding a drink. Hold on. He's gonna set the drink down and ignore the hissy, huffy noise Chou makes as he does... and then he turns to sit himself on the sofa, facing Sanji. ]
Perhaps we should be attempting to desensitise you to such attacks.
[ Tickle attack. Brace yourself. ]
no subject
He is also jumping straight off that couch with his shield in tow, waggling it in Yusuke's direction like a warning]
O-oi now, let's talk about this!
[Yusuke needs to keep his sinful hands to himself]
no subject
I'm hardly going to torment you. I am merely thinking of how to prevent you from being blind-sided sudden jabs.
[ Yes. Precisely.
Yusuke shifts slightly, unfolding his legs from under him so he can stand up. The battle begins. ]
no subject
[Lord, he's starting to descend into French comebacks, too, which is how you know the man is flustered. No he doesn't want. to be. tickled??? Smack him, throw him out a window, set him on fire -- he will take any of those punishments instead.
-- Also, Sanji is no coward, but he might be edging toward his bedroom, with that damned pillow still held out like a weapon]
no subject
I am not the one that gets into at least one fight every time we go on a date.
[ The gauntlet: laid down. ]
no subject
So unfair that Sanji stops and momentarily lowers the pillow, as if Yusuke just struck his most vulnerable core]
Only because everyone keeps pissing me off! [Muttered darkly. He can still recount the horror.] It's just me going on the defensive!
[So excuse you, good sir, he is a saint among men, constantly overwhelmed by the sins of humanity.]
no subject
That's no reason to light them up though, you know.
[ Ah, okay. While he is shook and defenceless, Yusuke swoops in and... just catches hold of Sanji's face and presses a kiss to his lips. Very brief, and mostly for an element of surprise. ]
But the valiant attempts "go on the defensive" are appreciated on some level.
[ Your pillow can't save you now, Sanji. He's in your bubble. ]